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Twisters: Tales from The Romper Room, Urban Edition

Now I know every one knows and has heard of Romper Room.  In fact, most of us have had it televised in our neighborhood at one time or another.  But I have stumbled upon an alternate version of the beloved Romper Room.  Seems that different areas had very different versions.

Let’s take for example what the magic mirror sees in different areas of the country.  At the end of each show, the hostess would look into her magic mirror, chanting those immortal words… “Romper, bomper, stomper, boo. Tell me, tell me, tell me, do. Magic mirror, tell me today. Have all my friends been good at play?” now in areas such as The Hamptons and Upper Manhattan, the hostess might say, “I see Mary and little Johnny, and Sally and Timmy…”etc.  But in the rougher parts of the country, such as Harlem or East L.A., she might say something along the lines of…

“I see Jimmy playing with his poopy pants,”

“Chuckie stop masturbating – you’ll go blind”,

“You two, Suzy and Bobby, stop playing doctor and put your clothes back on”

“Straighten your little assup right now, maggot, or I’m gonna tell the Boogey Man to pay you a little visit!”

“Oh, and there’s Tommy…Tommy, if you don’t stop eating the paste, I will use this mirror to spank your bottom beet red!”

(Oh the things the Magic Mirror sees, lol).

So now that I have introduced you to the Urban Edition of the Romper Room, I hope to bring you other tales that spawn from that long since forgotten, but as always, tantalizingly twisted place.

Mommy Lexus

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